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      09-18-2019, 08:05 PM   #4625
MaximusJ's Avatar

Drives: 340Xi MG 2017
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: Quebec, Canada

iTrader: (21)

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And just so I stay on topic, here are a few experiences from the last year or so.

General consensus :
- Own your weight. Living a lie and hiding behind old pics is not gonna help you in any way!
- Why would you hide the fact that you smoke? This is kinda obvious when you dont smoke yourself.
- If you just want something physical; why dont you say it? Instead of playing the serious relationship game and change your mind after a date or two. Dont wait until one or the other is emotionally attached to tell him/her that you are not ready to commit.
- Please dont hide your serious illness or life threatening situation. Finding our that someone has MS or is bipolar after feelings are in the way is not easy to deal with for both sides. Lets just say it; it sucks.

Last summer, I was chatting with a Vietnamese on tinder (and quickly switched to sms afterwards) and the discussions were interesting; so we decided to meet. First date it was pretty dark outside, and I was tipsy; so I knew we had a good time, but didnt over-analyze anything (Mistake #1). But then she wanted to meet again; which I agreed to and we met at my place (Mistake #2). She was like 10X more stressed than the initial date; ended up drinking her stress and after a little while she was very wobbly and even fell on two occasions and had to puke. At this point I realized she had no intentions of going back home that night, but unfortunately it didnt end like she was expecting. I couldnt throw her out or call a cab since her car was here. She ended up sleeping on my couch with the garbage can besides her in case she needed to puke. There wasnt even anybody to watch, but still I felt embarrassed. That felt so weird that in the morning I waited until she woke up and left to get out of my bedroom. I told her I wasnt seeing any relationship potential and she kept calling me for a good month, telling me that she'd want to see me again and that she missed me and (Mistake #3) I was still answering because I didnt want to be a dick. But she wasnt processing the message. She finally understood when I stopped answering.

This other one is now the reason why I run away when they say they've been on the site for a few hours or days. On one night, I get a match, a "out of my league" kinda match. We end up chatting non stop from 6 pm to 1 am; had a few drinks and things were aligning perfectly. We traded our phone number so we can txt each other on the next day since we were both working. On that second day, I texted her in the middle of the morning; and never got an answer. Oh well, she was a cop and everything, so I didnt worry about it. But never got an answer. That second night, she was kinda distant, but she was so good looking that I knew there must have been dozens of guys lining up. And each next day our discussions were shorter and shorter. Until I took the bull by the horns and invited her over for dinner on that friday night. We were supposed to watch some Game of thrones after. The evening as a whole was to dream of. She refused to watch GoT saying that it was a backup plan in case we didnt hit it off. All night we were chatting almost nose to nose while tasting a few glasses too many of fine whiskey. Discussions were deep; she even ended up asking if I had my vasectomy! I asked if I could kiss her; which she responded that she didnt want to rush / spoil anything. At some point I am not sure what happened or not but we did kiss. And she ended up inviting herself to stay at my place. Since she didnt want to rush / spoil anything, I didnt make a move. In fact, I was kinda drunk and her too; and I was awake for almost 24h at this point. So I got in bed before her and fell asleep before she even came in bed (Fail; I know!). I woke up a few hours later and she already left (Clearly DUI; which I found weird; her being a cop). Later that day she told me that she wasnt seeing / feeling it and that, in fact, on thats night, while she was talking to me, she was thinking about someone else. This may sound stupid, but even if those news were devastating, it's still the best date I ever had in my whole life. That's how perfect it was. I cant shake the idea that if we would have met in another context; without all these guys after her, the outcome would have been completely different. But it is what it is; her loss. I still felt like being dumped for a good 2 to 3 weeks; and feeling uber stupid about it on top of it.
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