[cmyx6go]

Originally Posted by vreihen16

Our driveway (and my BP Garage List) feels so empty tonight.....

Mighty Dodge is gone?

[wtwo3]

They told me I would love kids and my whole mentality would change once I had my own.

I still don't like kids (in general.... I'm cool with my own kids, but gawddamnn do they test the limits of my patience) and my mentality is the same. I think back fondly to a life before kids. The quality of vacations has dropped off the side of a cliff from before kids vs. after. I can't even take a dump in peace.

Am I just a psychopath?

[Esteban]

Originally Posted by wtwo3

They told me I would love kids and my whole mentality would change once I had my own.

I still don't like kids (in general.... I'm cool with my own kids, but gawddamnn do they test the limits of my patience) and my mentality is the same. I think back fondly to a life before kids. The quality of vacations has dropped off the side of a cliff from before kids vs. after. I can't even take a dump in peace.

Am I just a psychopath?

Kids are great, it takes work to be good parents.

If you're lucky they grow up to be your best friend.

[wtwo3]

Originally Posted by Esteban

Kids are great, it takes work to be good parents.

If you're lucky they grow up to be your best friend.

Without this turning into a "I hate my kids" discussion.... because I don't.... I'm just saying in general I don't like kids and me having my own hasn't changed that view. I strive to be a good parent more because it's the right thing to do for them. But man I don't enjoy it. No getting over that feeling.

[Esteban]

Originally Posted by wtwo3

Without this turning into a "I hate my kids" discussion.... because I don't.... I'm just saying in general I don't like kids and me having my own hasn't changed that view. I strive to be a good parent more because it's the right thing to do for them. But man I don't enjoy it. No getting over that feeling.

I understand what you're saying.

It was different for me. Love being a dad. Always did. Now that they're grown I have a best friend in my daughter who is now 40. She is a very big part of my life.

[vreihen16]

Originally Posted by cmyx6go

Mighty Dodge is gone?

Yes, and we both miss it already after only a few hours.

It was getting to the age where it needed some cosmetic TLC, and I am no longer physically able to do even the basics any more. I found the right home for it, and the new owner is excited to own it and used to own an identical one previously. Sold it well below blue book, but money isn't everything as long as I know it went to a good home.

We are now down to our two EV's, as well as the Audi race car that's stuck in the hauler now that we're Dodge-less until I can find/borrow something to tow it out to the road so that I can drop the ramp. First time since we were married that there hasn't been at least one Mopar in our fleet.

My DW has been on her computer all day looking at used Mercedes Sprinter vans. A bit too soon for me to be adopting a new vehicle, but maybe if there was a Freightliner-badged Sprinter for sale I might go look at it.....

[Darth One]

Children are put on earth to test you

[Turkish Pickle]

Originally Posted by Turkish Pickle

i realized i don't love my car anymore

it sounds immature, but i tried washing it today and i was not feeling it at all. the car's disgusting (been moving and it's been muddy rainy here) and it needs a wash but today just felt like a chore. i love washing my car otherwise, it's almost therapeutic to make it shiny and smooth. also remembered how i never had this with my previous car

so i'm not sure what to do. definitely having some sort of a quarter life crisis too and i was kinda thinking the car would be a "stable" thing through this transition phase, but i don't know how much i want to keep it further. im not going to sell it soon, i think, but i dont think i'd be too sad if i didn't drive it for a few weeks, either.

since we're all car guys and gals here, have you guys ever had this? it's new to me, i've never felt like a car i've owned/driven just feel so mundane and "meh" and replacable. not really sure what to do, i dont think i should act solely on impulse and feelings but i'm also not feeling too happy about spending $1500/mo all-in on something that i'm no longer fully bought-in to

update, if anyone's curious

i found out about a newly founded business where they rent detailing bays and tools etc (just bring your supplies, labor, and car), and i'd been wanting to find something like this. esp living downtown without even a driveway, it was hard to have a good space to wash my car. the 4 minute limited "self service washes" only do so much (where i was last) and i'd been wanting to learn more about detailing/cleaning cars, mainly paint correction, just because i'm obsessive and i'd like to keep the paint vibrant as long as i own the car.

spent 3 hours cleaning the car today, only realized it was 3 hours when i grabbed my phone to take some after photos.

strong chance it was the move that was on my mind; moving stresses me out a lot. having the opportunity to make the car brand new again was a very proud moment, it felt good to look at the car after with a dumb smile on my face

[Turkish Pickle]

post-clean photos; will go in 2 weeks for their machine polishing class. how awesome you can rent a polisher at a rental detailing bay?

[M_Six]

Wow. Very nice.

[________]

Super job Pickle!! Nice car! Valencia Orange?

[Turkish Pickle]

Originally Posted by Onesie

Super job Pickle!! Nice car! Valencia Orange?

Thank you!

It's Sunset Orange - Valencia only came on the 1st gen X1 and on the 1M, it's more orange. Sakhir on the other hand is more reddish, Sunset is like the middle ground between the two. IRL it's very close to Sedona Red that came on the 1er coupes

[Darth One]

You did a really good job!

I still really, really love the feeling of seeing a beautifully detailed car, but I confess that I no longer have the will to actually detail my cars. I had them ceramic coated and ppf'ed, and now I just maintain the stuff. Tbh it's not as good as doing full details every 6 months (maybe an obvious comment here)

[rebekahb]

Originally Posted by wtwo3

They told me I would love kids and my whole mentality would change once I had my own.

I still don't like kids (in general.... I'm cool with my own kids, but gawddamnn do they test the limits of my patience) and my mentality is the same. I think back fondly to a life before kids. The quality of vacations has dropped off the side of a cliff from before kids vs. after. I can't even take a dump in peace.

Am I just a psychopath?

Just wait until that $10k Disney trip. We might have to talk you off the ledge

Raising kids is hard. It ebbs and flows. It's ok not to love it. Maybe you just don't love the young stage. It might change as they get older. You're definitely not a psychopath, just honest.

[wtwo3]

Originally Posted by rebekahb

Just wait until that $10k Disney trip. We might have to talk you off the ledge

Raising kids is hard. It ebbs and flows. It's ok not to love it. Maybe you just don't love the young stage. It might change as they get older. You're definitely not a psychopath, just honest.

Thanks... I do think I'll enjoy it more once they're older... hopefully.

Ugh the Disney trip... I reached out to one of those Disney planners and they put together a pretty decent looking itinerary for about $7k... but thats obviously not including flights and food. At least it won't be crazy like some were suggesting.

[Dang3r]

Originally Posted by Turkish Pickle

post-clean photos; will go in 2 weeks for their machine polishing class. how awesome you can rent a polisher at a rental detailing bay?

Wait, is that an ugly a$$ 3 series? I confess that I am by far the greatest 3 series hater, sorry for you

[UncleWede]

Originally Posted by Turkish Pickle

spent 3 hours cleaning the car today, only realized it was 3 hours when i grabbed my phone to take some after photos.

So, a basic wash, maybe even cleaned the windows???

I don't care what ANYONE tells you, you do not put wax/LSP on with anything other than your bare hand, caressing your baby's smooth bare paint with a loving touch . . .


BRB

[CamasM3e93]

Originally Posted by wtwo3

They told me I would love kids and my whole mentality would change once I had my own.

I still don't like kids (in general.... I'm cool with my own kids, but gawddamnn do they test the limits of my patience) and my mentality is the same. I think back fondly to a life before kids. The quality of vacations has dropped off the side of a cliff from before kids vs. after. I can't even take a dump in peace.

Am I just a psychopath?

Definitely not a psychopath but I think you meant sociopath but you aren't that either. Having kids creates tremendous life change and much of it isn't fun. Throw on unrealistic societal expectations that of course you're going to love parenthood and it's a real setup for dissatisfaction. I felt similarly earlier in my own journey but am finding the middle years of my kid's childhood more rewarding. Doesn't mean I don't love my child, either. I just wasn't all that keen on the challenges and tumult of early parenting. I think the change for me came as my daughter became more independent and I was able to get some of my own time back.

You don't hate parenting, you just aren't fond of it in it's current form TODAY and it's going to change from here for sure.

[JMcLellan]

Originally Posted by Mbwny

Just turned 40. Copped an M8. Literally the definition of midlife crisis and I love every second of it.

Yes! I can relate. Picked up my M240i within a month of turning 40. I know not in the same class or convo as an M8, but I was the first to tell friends and family that the car was my midlife crisis purchase.

[wtwo3]

Originally Posted by CamasM3e93

Definitely not a psychopath but I think you meant sociopath but you aren't that either. Having kids creates tremendous life change and much of it isn't fun. Throw on unrealistic societal expectations that of course you're going to love parenthood and it's a real setup for dissatisfaction. I felt similarly earlier in my own journey but am finding the middle years of my kid's childhood more rewarding. Doesn't mean I don't love my child, either. I just wasn't all that keen on the challenges and tumult of early parenting. I think the change for me came as my daughter became more independent and I was able to get some of my own time back.

You don't hate parenting, you just aren't fond of it in it's current form TODAY and it's going to change from here for sure.

Thanks for this - this gives me hope. And I totally feel the societal pressures. It's like any mention of me not enjoying parenthood is met with responses indicating I'm some sort of a jerk or a bad parent.

I think my kids being more independent and giving me some of my own time back will be the turning point as you said. Right now it's little things that just crush my soul... simple things like going out to eat being a pleasurable activity again as opposed to a completely stressful experience. Or even coming back home after an evening out where all I want to do is change and plop down in bed - but instead have to go through a bedtime routine for 2 kids. I can probably count on one hand the number of nights where I've had a good, uninterrupted night's sleep - despite professional sleep training help.

I always "joke" (but I'm serious) about how I can't wait till my daughter is 12 and my son is 8. But I do feel the new challenges that brings, I'll be better able to work with as a result of better ability to connect with my kids, and their own independence giving me my time back.

[Alfisti]

Modern women have ruined parenting, there I said it. They're so fucking neurotic that it has turned parenting into a 24/7 ordeal. i realise one needs to commit to one's kids and do your best to raise healthy, happy and well adjusted people but fuck me dead the fussing we do over them. Here is a short-list of the bullshit we deal with today that never happened in the past;

- Asking kids instead of telling them.... and then wondering why they don't listen

- Trying to deal with a 2 year old like it's a fucking negotiation with an adult

- 24/7 child care from both parents in the name of equality. To be frank ladies, if I am working i need to sleep, especially if when I get home I need to be ready to take the child off of you so you get a breather, i can't do that on 3 hrs sleep and he is gonna need you overnight to feed him regardless so why am i awake to fluff your pillow? Divide and conquer people, divide and conquer, this is why it feels so overwhelming, by being joined at the hip we have turned 2 parents into 1.25.

- This whole taking kids on city vacations etc, WTF are you doing? Is there a beach? Are there thrill rides? No? Then don't fucking take them because they get bored. Best vacation we have had in 10 years was when we dumped the kids on the sister in law and buggered off to southern france for a week (we then returned the favour).

- "It's all about the children" ...... so the marriage is put t the side completely and both parties resent it

- Bratty, spoilt kids because parenting style has no consequences

- Helicoptering, shadowing, fear fo dirt and mud.... jesus let the little fucker breathe and make mistakes. Don't be an idiot, strap them in to a good car seat etc but christ on a bike the coddling.

I could keep going, god i hate what my generation (X) has done to parenting, bunch of fucking muppets i swear.

[Alfisti]

Originally Posted by wtwo3

I always "joke" (but I'm serious) about how I can't wait till my daughter is 12 and my son is 8. But I do feel the new challenges that brings, I'll be better able to work with as a result of better ability to connect with my kids, and their own independence giving me my time back.

Mine are 10 and 6 and indeed it is 1000 times better than 5 and 1. They talk, they eat, they play sports, they wrestle, they go to school, they have friends..... it's not easy but laughably easier than 5 and 1.